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Family togetherness is on the rise!  #silverlining     In case you're running out of topics to discuss around the dinner table or on another walk around the neighborhood, here's one of my favorites...

Deliberately Defy Relational Drift


Thoughtfully crafted. Artfully designed. Dynamically unique. 

 A simple tool for creative, productive dialogue


Casually brought on a date and placed on the table, the craftsman leather pouch, tactilely thick cards, and thoughtfully worded questions invite you and your partner into a playfully engaged conversation that deepens your connection. 

48 question cards - 4 categories

Road Trips. Date nights. End of the day sofa time.


our WHY

 So often, when couples actually have time to really talk, time is easily spent reporting the latest details of the calendar and chatting about work, in-laws, or kids.

 What was once an energetic relationship could end up feeling more like conversational numbness. 

 We passionately created a tool to bring back relational closeness through deeper, more real conversations.  Pursuing a deeper knowing of your spouse will feel purposeful and will lead to growth, development, and maturity. 



Rather than "one time" questions, Defy Drift cards are categorized to stimulate up-to-date creative, productive dialogue:

  • PLAY- easy "what if" questions that stem playful, creative big picture dialogue that stirs new ideas
  • CONNECT- emotionally curious dialogue about what is most relevant to each of you in life right now  
  • PURSUE- questions to encourage you to discuss the quality of romance and intimacy in your relationship.  
  • VISION- these are forward-focused questions to create a new sense of intentionality around values, goals, and big decisions.

Our Story

   On long road trips from Atlanta to Texas to visit family over the last ten years, my husband and I would begin the car ride chatting and catching up on the current events of our household, kids activities, and work related topics. After two hours of quick conversations, the silence would eventually set in as we discovered we had come the end of our “catching up”…with 12 more hours left to go! 

    The silence was a signal we both took note of. After sitting in the awkward silence for a while, Todd turned to me and asked a witty, open ended question that reminded me of when we were dating. It reminded me of the chase, the back and forth obsession of getting to know someone who you are interested in. We wrote that question down and over the years kept adding to the list of questions. We called them “road trip conversations”. 

   We often talk about the questions to couples and finally decided to take the paper list from my car and make them available to the world. We are grateful for your support and we hope you find these questions a helpful tool in creating connection with your spouse.  


About Us

Todd and Beverly Sandel

Our Team

Marriage Leadership Vacations

The SouthCity Group

Todd and Beverly Sandel

Todd is the founder of The SouthCity Group and a licensed marriage and family therapist. Together, we are passionate about helping couples defy the natural drift that happens and recapture the thrill of being together.


The SouthCity Group

Marriage Leadership Vacations

The SouthCity Group

We are an executive coaching and leadership architect firm built to help leaders galvanize greatness in themselves, their teams, and their organizations.


Marriage Leadership Vacations

Marriage Leadership Vacations

Marriage Leadership Vacations

We bring leaders and their spouses to bucket-list destinations and intentionally blend physical fitness, novelty adventure, and marriage leadership principles.  

Want to know more about our parent company, The SouthCity Group?

If you are a leader and want to learn more about The SouthCity Group executive coaching or leadership consultation services, or if you're wanting to bring a group of leaders and their spouses on an epic marriage vacation, please visit our SouthCity Group website.